Category: Humor

Good Intentions vs. Good Sleep

If I want to go to sleep early, I have to set AT LEAST one alarm to remind myself, one hour ahead of actually eyes-shut.

I used to say “one hour ahead of lights-out”, but that was before the whole internet opened for business by my bedside via my phone.

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Source: some anonymous genius; found on the internet

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Posted on by Phil Marsosudiro

Not ADHD but Toilet Paper — Who Knew?

“Mary was so fidgety she couldn’t concentrate… I was shocked to find that harsh toilet tissue was the cause.”

“I was worried when Mary’s teacher told me she was restless in school and couldn’t seem to concentrate. When I asked Mary what was the matter she complained of an itching. I asked a friend’s advice at Mother’s Club that afternoon. She said it was probably caused by harsh or impure toilet tissue, and recommended ScotTissue. So I bought some ScotTissue. It looked very pure and soft. In a few days Mary’s trouble had entirely disappeared.”

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Source: ScotTissue ad spotted on the internet.
From 1933, per “Soap, Sex, and Cigarettes: A Cultural History of American Advertising”, by Juliann Sivulka

Posted on by Phil Marsosudiro

Adderall + Thomas Jefferson =

“When Ben Franklin gives you some of his Adderall and you write the whole Declaration of Independence in one night.”

Source: adapted from a joke found on the internet. The original joke-writer said the Adderall was from John Locke but that would be anachronistic. Jefferson drafted the Declaration in 1776; John Locke died in 1704.

Posted on by Phil Marsosudiro